The Beast That Killed Women (1965)

"Be careful - he's no teddy bear!"

A man is lying ill in hospital. A police arrives to question him and he tells a sorry story in flashback. He and his wife (they sleep in separate beds and don't seem to have names) are nudists and they gave up their usual romp at the local nudist camp for a night of wild partying with friends. The next morning, they wake and the wife decides to do some nude sunbathing in the back garden. But, worried that she might be seen by the neighbours, the husband agrees that they should both go to the camp after all.

Arriving at the camp, the couple witness the usual activities - volleyball games, walks in the woods through some scratchy looking undergrowth, appalling acting - before settling in for their holiday. That evening, the camp holds a bonfire party during which hardy nudists (now clothed) gather around the world's smallest bonfire and one of them does a dance for the entertainment of the other guests. But she's being watched from the undergrowth by a horny gorilla who's so turned on by this display of gyrating that he decides to drop in on some of the guests who have decided to give the excitement of the bonfire party a miss. The gorilla grabs one of the women and makes off with her, but when she tries to escape, he chases her and strangles her.

The following morning, the woman's body is found by a female camper and a man in nasty shorts who run off for help. A curious crowd gathers as the body is taken away in an ambulance and the killing is soon the talk of the camp. That evening, some campers engage in the world's worst square dancing display to the accompaniment of that Godawful music that only ever appeared in nudist films. Perhaps driven mad by this amazing spectacle, the gorilla returns to the camp and attacks the husband, throwing him into a river as his wife looks on, screaming. With the husband taken off to hospital in a state of shock, the wife is later unable to tell the police anything other the man's attacker was "hairy and big" and that it was bigger than a man, though in truth it patently wasn't. The policeman suggests that it might have been a gorilla, and the wife agrees that it's possible. At this point it should be noted that the flashback seems to have been abandoned as the scenes at the hospital are now happening concurrently with the main action.

The campers are, understandably, frightened and are soon leaving in droves, causing a headache for the owners. While the husbands agonises over the choice of desert served up at the hospital, the police decide to use a policewoman as a decoy to trap the killer. The plan works and the ape returns to attack the woman. She frightens it off and her gun-totin' colleagues give chase, gunning the unfortunate creature down.

With the ape killed, a relieved owner welcomes back his guests and the police learn from a local roof repair man that the gorilla was being kept in a garage by a local old rich woman. Fully recovered from his experience, the husband returns to the camp and is reunited with his wife in time for more naked frolicking in the pool.
KEVIN LYONS

Last Updated: 15 October, 2008