Brain Donors (1992)

When a major studio release runs under 75 minutes, you know disastrous previews prompted drastic pruning. An uncredited remake of A Night at the Opera, this casts John Turturro as an unfunny Groucho, Mel Smith as a non Italian Chico and Bob Nelson (who?) as a talking Harpo. With Nancy Marchand as Margaret Dumont, some bland lovers and a sneery ballet dancer villain, all the ingredients (including a harp joke) are in place as lawyer Turturro runs a ballet company into the ground. While the lead trio stoop to imitating the Three Stooges, they all come out collectively as somewhat less amusing than Zeppo on a bad day. Really, really foul.

First Published In: Empire (issue unknown)

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