An American Vampire Story (1997)

An annoying nothing-in-particular comedy, full of pointless references to AIP beach party movies. Frankie (Trevor Lissauer), a Californian teen left alone in his parents' beach house for the summer, finds his life invaded by Count Eric von Zipper (Johnny Venokur), aka Moondoggie, a pudgy hipster vampire who moves in with his Renfield-like minion (Sydney Lassick) and a pair of vampire babes (Carmen Electra, Debra Xavier) then puts thick black curtains up to keep out the sun. Frankie, who has a girlfriend named DeeDee (Daisy Tormé), summons Dr Ludwig von Helsingmeister (Adam West), aka the Big Kahuna, a laid-back surfer dude vampire hunter.

It tries for a stretch of poignance towards the end, as Frankie loses his girl to the vampire and realises from a wall of photocopied missing pets and persons posters that the neighbourhood is being eaten away, but immediately gets back to weak jokes and meaningless chat. Fluffy the dog is exploded in a microwave and Nacho the gardener is eaten on the grounds that he's named after a snack. Tormé has a nice moment when semi-vampirised, staring at TV static like a stoner. Directed by Luis Esteban.
KIM NEWMAN

First published in this form here.

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